smack my kids up
I apologise for this half-hearted attempt at a post. Really. It was going to be something great, but the thoughts just aren't coming!
What i want to talk about is Christians and smacking.
Why are Christians fighting the anti-smacking laws with such vigour???
Wouldn't it be better to show people that Christians are against child abuse? For example, if you have friends who have trouble with alcohol, you might decide to not drink, because it shows them that you can have fun without drinking. If you have friends who have trouble refraining from beating their kids, why not stop smacking yours, and show them that there are other ways of disciplining kids?
Before i worked as a nanny, i was all for smacking. Its Biblical, it shows kids that what they're doing is wrong. But as a nanny you aren't allowed to smack children. So you have to find other ways. As I discovered one day, to a four year old, taking her favourite toy until she behaves satisfactorally really gets to her and makes her realise that how she is behaving is unacceptable. Or sending a child out of the room, into a room or place where she is removed from fun things really makes them think about not doing the bad behaviour in the start. It can be done without smacking! So why shouldn't we lead by example??!! Why are we fighting for the right to hit our children?!?!
I also find that its not a great example to say to kids "you must not hit other children or adults when you don't like what they're doing, or when what they're doing is wrong" and yet as parents we hit children when they do something wrong. What kind of example setting is this?
I was smacked as a child, and i've turned out ok (some would say), but i still remember the fear and hatred that i felt when i was older (say 10-12) and was smacked. And I remember the day when I decided that i didn't want to be smacked anymore, and dodged, myself taking a swipe at my mother.
I think we should see it as a challenge, to strive to discipline our kids without smacking them. To not respond in the heat of the moment, with a swift slap to the butt, but to try and keep our temper, speak calmly, and think of a way to punish our wayward child that doesn't involve smacking them.
I'm not saying for a moment that parenting is easy. In fact, i found nannying one of the biggest challenges I have faced. Children can, quite routinely, make you feel like you've reached the end of your tether and you're fed up with them and their nonsense. I understand why parents smack kids in anger. I also understand why perfectly calm parents discipline their children by way of a smack. I do understand. I don't think its the best way though.
I also don't think it's setting a good example to people who don't know Jesus. Couldn't Christians be known for their anti-violent ways, and great parenting skills instead of their strange fixation with the right to hit their kids?